Delicate regimental question

[Rex_Tremende]

Ok, so I may regret this question in the morning, after the celebratory vodka tonics wear off. . . can't think of a better time to ask, though...


So, I think I'm wearing my kilts at the right length, if not too long (UK mediums a tad too long for traditional, but OK for contemporary, new Sport Kilt is just about perfect). However, I've noticed that sometimes when I sit, my private bits graze the seat over the rear hem, despite care in smoothing out the pleats as I go. Does that mean that I'm just a bubble butt, or is that part of the thrill of the kilt?

Anonymous in Cincinnati

[Caradoc]

Does that mean that I'm just a bubble butt, or is that part of the thrill of the kilt?

Where is the bottom edge of the kilt hitting on your leg? Above the knee?

And where's the waistline on the kilt? Does it sit where your jeans would sit, or higher, or what?

[chasem]

well, I don't think I quite understand what you're asking. From what I gather of your question, your kilts are long enough to cover everything, but when you sit down, your jewels are near the bottom of the kilt?

I don't know how that could happen, unless you're "well endowed," as a kilt of nominal length should cover everything just fine.

[Kilted KT]

sounds to me like you have one of three problems.

1. You are not doing a proper sweep before sitting.

2. Your kilt is too short.

3. You are wearing your kilt too high.

first and last are easy to fix. #2 takes some time and maybe some money.

I'll let the experts chime in on #1 and #3

as far as the tonics, you've nothing to regret about asking such a question. You may get a ribbing or two, but not harm done.

[Yaish]

Sounds like bubble butt. Standing straight up, have someone check you out from front, side profile, and the back. If the bottom of your kilt in the back isnt level with the bottom edge in the front, you've got bubblebutt.

Either that, or you are wearing the back where you are supposed to, but the front is pushed down below the belly (if you have a belly) and the measurements when taken from there, are inaccurate with respect to the rest. Thats when a UK 'beergut cut' would be helpful.

If it is just bubblebutt, you can try pushing down the waistband in the read just before you sit, to give you a couple extra inches. So long as your shirt is tucked in and long enough you avoid 'plumbers cleavage'. Just be sure to pull everything back in order when you stand.

[bangkok kilt]

I for one have had similar situations. The back of the kilt just has farther to go when you sit down. The aprons get all the slack, but the back rides up. I find that this is particularly the case when I sit close the the edge of the seat. When I sit all the way back in the chair then I find that everything's in order.

Definately a eye-opener the first few times though.

[Pour1Malt]

reminds ma o' thot auld song....


"dae yur baws hang law, dae they wobble tae an fraw".... :rolleyes:

[bangkok kilt]

reminds ma o' thot auld song....


"dae yur baws hang law, dae they wobble tae an fraw".... :rolleyes:

hmm, and I always thought it was "do your ears hang low. . ."

man was I wrong!

[ckelly327]

My problem is that I have no butt, but a beer gut so I have funky fits at times. I've found that when getting into a chair or booth or car that I need to sit sideways with a good sweep and then turn my body into the proper position. This has helped relieve the jewels hitting the seat syndrome. There's also the two handed sweep that seems to help.

[Robin]

Some seats are not very kilt friendly and sometimes it's hard to do a proper sweep...in a pub or restaurant when there's hardly room to move the chair for instance.

My favorite restaurant is very kilt friendly...when I book a table they always make sure I get a chair without arm rests and enough space to move the chair