Petition for release

[ccga3359]

Good people of XMarks, I deplore you to sign my petition for release from the Saskatchewan Institute for the Criminaly Kilted. Despite the fact that I have gained 35 Lbs here (tapioca tonight) I am wasting away. Many of you know the nefarious reasons for my incastration here in the flatest land in the world. It is because of the fictitious meanderings of the one they call Panache in that piece of tripe he called Panach and Great blah, blah, blah..

In spite of the fact that he has one hot wife, Panache has many faults. In particular is his jealousy of my gorgeous, flowing, golden locks and firm round buttocks. You must also realize that it was he who invaded my peaceful country, the same country that I liberated 32 years prior. The same country that I so rightfully sit on the throne for*.

Please, I ask of you to write to your local Moderator and ask for, nay, demand my release.

Thank you and...

...Ohh tapioca!



*damn Poutines

[Colin]

Damn it Grant we told you to sit down quietly and eat your porridge!!!

One more out break like this and we'll put you in lederhusen and send you to the facility in Nunavit.

[ccga3359]

Damn it Grant we told you to sit down quietly and eat your porridge!!!

One more out break like this and we'll put you in lederhusen and send you to the facility in Nunavit.

Thank you for your efforts to secure my release. However I was thinking a little further south.

[Rex_Tremende]

Incastration??? How awful for you!

Regards,
Rex.

[Erisianmonkey]

Incastration??? How awful for you!

Yeah, I wasn't gonna touch that one. Er....

[ccga3359]

Incastration??? How awful for you!

Regards,
Rex.

Yes, I overheard Panache say something about my 'short comings' and 'getting my comeuppance'. I wasn't really listening too intently as I was wondering why this guy's wearing a pink kilt.

[BEEDEE]

Incastration is the least they could do for you in the Saskatchewan Institute for the Criminaly Kilted. That treatment might firm those buttocks some more.

Brian

[Wompet]

To the Parole Board of the Saskatchewan Institute for the Criminally Kilted:

My recent investigations have shown that Grant had temporarily fallen under the malignant influence of the Spor'ran Chicken of Rhu-ber. This artifact, the name of which is often incorrectly anglicized as the Rubber Chicken Sporran, has exerted its malignant control over weak-minded kilt-wearers for over two centuries. Through Grant it also influenced the actions of the temporarily Sinister and Obscene Kilt Syndicate, until Grant was rendered unconscious during the crash of the Maple Leaf.

Having been free of Chicken's influence for some time now, Grant should have regained what little sanity he had previous to recent events.

[McClef]

"The Land of Open Skies" it says on the vehicle plates I am informed.

Ontario is "Yours to discover" so I would be more careful about those so be careful about advertising those "firm round buttocks"

[pdcorlis]

Gentlemen, does anyone really need reminding of what can happen when Grant is given unmonitored freedom?



Be afraid, be very afraid...