Bagpipe humour!

[tripleblessed]

What do you call a person who hangs out with musicians at their gigs? ................... A drummer. Or, a singer;
depends on which you're addressing.

[Oilverland]

What do you call a person who hangs out with musicians at their gigs? ................... A drummer. Or, a singer;
depends on which you're addressing.

Argh! I'm a singer. But all is fair in humor.

Regarding Dollander's question above "Seriously, though, do people really despise the bagpipes that much? I realize that not everyone shares the passion for them that some of us have, but I always thought that hating on them was just a cultural trope...not unlike making fun of men in kilts, when the reactions I and others here receive in public have certainly proven that one false."..

Actually I like bagpipe music a lot, as well as accordions and banjos. I own two tenor banjos, recent acquisitions that each need new tuners, which I will tune 'Chicago style', like a guitar, so I can use my limited uke and guitar skills to play them. I was also given a toy accordion that works but I don’t know how to play it.

I think somebody piping at my funeral (mind you I’m healthy, but I am 71) would be great, although I might prefer the more secular Simple Gifts, e.g., https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1ZFuSYjd41w over Amazing Grace since I follow an eastern religion, one which emphasizes simplicity. For a less perfect performance see https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w22vUYwVFmM and look at the smiles on the faces there. That would be me, looking on in spirit.

For our local Robbie Burns day celebration I will be singing his Marry Morrison and Ye Banks and Braes with an accordionist(!) accompanying me. I'll also lead a group sing of The Bonnie Banks O' Loch Lomond and the comedic Donald, Where's Your Troosers? (even though I am a gentleman when in a kilt – see joke above) And I'll join in backing up Auld Lang Syne. For those last three songs I'll play my uke, another instrument that some would rather not hear. I like all musical instruments, just keep me away from a squeaky string quartet.

[Tobus]

I own two tenor banjos, recent acquisitions that each need new tuners, which I will tune 'Chicago style', like a guitar, so I can use my limited uke and guitar skills to play them.

My advice, that's worth exactly what you paid for it, is to keep it tuned in fifths. Learning to play an instrument tuned in fifths is life-changing. And it completely changes the voice of the instrument, especially if you're going to use that tenor banjo for Irish/Celtic music like fiddle tunes (jigs, reels, etc.). Tuning it Chicago-style means you run out of range pretty quickly and can't play the tunes like they're meant to be played. Plus, fifth-tuning is just more logical across the strings and for different keys. Once you learn the ropes, you won't want to go back to those quircky guitar and uke tunings, trust me!

[Oilverland]

My advice, that's worth exactly what you paid for it, is to keep it tuned in fifths. Learning to play an instrument tuned in fifths is life-changing. And it completely changes the voice of the instrument, especially if you're going to use that tenor banjo for Irish/Celtic music like fiddle tunes (jigs, reels, etc.). Tuning it Chicago-style means you run out of range pretty quickly and can't play the tunes like they're meant to be played. Plus, fifth-tuning is just more logical across the strings and for different keys. Once you learn the ropes, you won't want to go back to those quircky guitar and uke tunings, trust me!

Maybe it's time I learned some finger picking. I've been avoiding it since high school. I've reasoned, Richie Havens was a great musician who only strummed. I dunno about teaching new tricks to this old dog, thanks for the encouragement.

=Tommy=

[tripleblessed]

Argh! I'm a singer. But all is fair in humor.

I've had a guitar since about '71, but between the head injuries and the aborted flights out of the ceilings when
other folks' equipment equipment failed, I don't have the hand dexterity to be considered much of a picker. So
I'm thought of as a singer, also. Not because of skill, but because I'm loud and I won't go away.

[OC Richard]

I had heard for years all these same jokes used for bagpipes, banjo, accordion, and less often drums.

I was surprised a number of years ago, on a string site, to find that all of these are also, in string circles, applied to the viola.

[OC Richard]

I don't have the lungs for the pipes.

I'll have to second (third? fourth?) the posts from pipers who rightly say that the idea that the pipes take an inordinate amount of air is a myth.

Back around 1975 my father and I made the long drive to visit our first Highland Games. We split up and wandered around, and when we met up I asked my father what he had been doing.

"I was listening to the best piper."

"Why do you say he was the best piper?"

"Because he wasn't working at it. His playing was effortless."

Now, my dad didn't know much about pipes and he wasn't a musician himself. But he had grown up with his father and brother being good musicians on a wide range of instruments (not including bagpipes).

The funny thing was that the piper my dad had spent so much time listening to WAS the best piper there! I found out later that it was Jimmy MacColl, a Gold Medalist in piobaireachd.

Later when I got onto the pipes I often saw Jimmy play and noticed, like my father, his effortless blowing. Rather than huff and puff, he blew steadily and gently. Jimmy has said that he approaches the blowing of the pipes as he would the flute: long even steady gentle air supply to the bag.

So much of playing effortlessly is the "setup". An efficient set of drones, efficiently reeded, with a comfortable air-tight bag, non-restrictive blowpipe and valve, and freeblowing efficient chanter reed will deliver a bold tone with minimal effort.

For sure there's skill and technique too! Many of us pipers have experienced the following: I'm out somewhere piping, and somebody comes up and wants to try the pipes. I hand them the pipes and they blow and blow till they nearly pass out and get nowt out of the pipes. That person suffers from the misconception that it's a matter of how much you blow. Then I take the pipes back, strike them in, remove the blowpipe, and play for a bit with no blowing at all. (I use an internal Moose valve.) The pipes seem to play themselves! A neat parlour trick, but it makes the point that less air is passing through an efficient set of pipes than people imagine.

My Bagpipe Idol is Gordon Walker. How easy he makes it look!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CrdrY0GttaM

[OC Richard]

How do you get two pipers in tune? Shoot one.

Sort of a remix of Antonio Vivaldi's "The only thing worse than one flute, is two."

But of course getting two bagpipes in tune is done all the time. So is getting 20 in tune!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bS4n5tjszp8

About banjos and bagpipes, in Irish music it's standard, and wonderful.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fNOnZTuWXzA

And bagpipes, banjo, and accordion together

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WBB8xy9YfF8

[Baeau]

.....And bagpipes, banjo, and accordion together.....

Richard,

One of the Englishmen I worked for told me, that combination was why Lemmings jumped into the sea.

[Katia]

It's interesting that people make the presumption that you've got to have superior "lung power" to play the pipes. Far from it. The bag is a reservoir for the air that drives the reeds. All you have to do is breathe normally and exhale into the bag to refill the reservoir. If your set-up is air-efficient, you don't have to breathe hard at all. There are many top-level pipers that are also smokers (some up to two or more packs a day! ).

The difficulty in learning to play the pipes is simply developing the coordination between blowing, squeezing and moving one's fingers (later you add in marching in time, watching where you're walking, and remembering the tunes you've - hopefully - memorized).


Re the OP: hadn't heard/read that one before.

I once had the chance to try a practice chanter. I could barely get a sound out of it-- or maybe I couldn't at all; it's been several years so I can't remember. The pipes themselves, I'm sure, are worse...