An excusable lie

[Norbydog]

Ok, I try to be honest, but seriously, we all bend the truth a little at times. If my wife asks me 'if her jeans make her **** look fat'..well...you get the idea.

I was visiting my mother this past weekend, who lives in a small town in the Midwest that can only be described as the cowboy capitol of the US. We went to eat at a restaurant for a late lunch which had an adjacent pub in the small building. Mind you, my mother works at the local high school, and I KNOW word will get arund town about who she was seen with.

As we walked in, I noticed that we were being followed by 4 males, each in ripped, dirty shirts, wearing Wrangler jeans, and two in dusty, worn straw cowboy hats. Each needed a bath, a razor, and a toothbrush. They were snickering at me in my kilt, and I shined them on by opening the door for them, and being very polite.

I went to use the restroom, and while I was washing my hands, post-necessity and one of the 4 entered. He was the one who I caught snickering twice as we walked in.

He looked at me, and asked "What's with the pants, cowboy?" Imagine snide tone of voice.

I replied, "You mean my kilt?"

He said "A what? What's it called?"

(This is where my lying starts. I apologize if I offend anyone, but I just wanted to see how far I could push an issue with someone so ignorant and rude.)

I told him again it was a kilt. He was standing at the urinal, I suppose using it, yet carrying on this conversation with me. I did not think it was an appropriate time or place to get involved in a lesson, or to use some witty comeback.

I told him that I was from the British Honduras. (A Lie) I said it is very hot there (Truth), and that I am just passing through (A Lie).

He asked me if 'that' is what is worn 'there'.

I told him yes, kilts are, and we (still pretending to be from afar) do not often wear pants (Lie).

I could not contain myself much longer, without blowing my cover, so out the door I went.

The British Honduras are now known as Belize and it is located in South America.

I think I could have told the guy I was a direct decendant of Robin Hood, and my great uncle is Groundskeeper Willie from The Simpsons.

[morrison]

... ... I told him that I was from the British Honduras. (A Lie) I said it is very hot there (Truth), and that I am just passing through (A Lie). ... ...
... The British Honduras are now known as Belize and it is located in South America. ...

Were those four of age to be out of doors, on their own? Were any of them over 21 years?
Anyway, cute story. But, truth is, they've likely lived much untruth in their lives. Meaning, if they are ignorant while truth is present and they've rejected truth, then they choose ignorance feigning intelligence therein living the lie of having any intelligence.
Siam would have been a stretch I think!

[Roan Carter]

Woooowww .... sounds like you survived the most uncomfortable possible situation, and you were the one who got the last laugh! Ha ha, wow.

[Tattoo Bradley]

Bahahahahaha!

[MacTavishOfJapan]

That's not lying as such, more taking advantage of others ignorance to have some fun with their lack of manners. Excellent. Sadly he'll probably never realise that you made a fool of him, we can only hope he proclaims kilts are from British Honduras in more educated company and makes a total idiot of himself!

[auld argonian]

Norbydog...

...I didn't know that you were a direct descendant of Robin Hood. And give your uncle Willie my regards when you see him...I enjoy his work on the Simpsons.

That must have been one of those priceless kilted moments.

Best

AA

[Schultz]

That's a great story!

I tend to say such things as of late, as my patience has been worn thin in the past few weeks due to stupidity at work. I refuse to take bring it home with me, so I tend to have a little fun on the rides home (I use public transportation). I'm generally in a much better mood when the wife pickes me up.

[David Dalglish]

A guy like that will never know that you were ribbing him--nice one

[Robin]

If my wife asks me 'if her jeans make her **** look fat'..well...you get the idea.

Uhm...A strome 8 yards handmade weathered MacLaren...to the stripe please...or I'll tell her

[KiltedCodeWarrior]

That is a great story! I have done similar things on occasion just to see how distracted people are by the kilt. You can say quite a bit without anybody realizing you are kidding.