So This Is What It Means To Be Kilted?

[Dreadbelly]

Life is different now.

Being kilted has changed much in my life. For one, my health problem is clearing up rapidly.

But there are other things, things more subtle and profound.

Wearing a kilt changes how people deal with you. Before, when I wore pants, it was always "Hey you." Or "You there" Now, it's "Sir." Or "Mister." I am not sure if I like being called Sir... Makes me feel old. People talk to me differently now. Now, when I go into some places that I have gone many times, I don't get asked to move along and quit loitering as I always have. I have actually been asked to stick around and add to the atmosphere. I get free drinks. (Coffee when I go to Port City Java) People treat me a lot better.

Bad part is, I have always gone to most of these places. And it's like they have never noticed me till now. Now when I take my scruffy dreadlocked self to the museum, I seem a lot more welcomed kilted then I ever did in troosers. Before, even before dreadlocks, I was always scowled at when I went into the museum. I am a poor person. And I dress accordingly. My closet looks like a Goodwill exploded. And when I went to the museum, folk would look down their nose at me. Tell me not to get things dirty. I was made to feel very unwelcome. And now kilted, and these are people who know me, and how I used to be, they treat me as if I was trendy and arty, and they want me to stick around as long as possible because, in a sense, I have become part of the artwork. Having a kilt has bought me a ticket into some stuck up social club that I want no part of. I love the museum, hate the curators. The hyprocrisy makes me feel sick to my stomach.

You know what? It's upsetting. Unsettling. Makes me feel cheap. Know what I mean? This has been the one sour turn off to my kilted experience. It is not enough to make me stop wearing a kilt, far from that, but it has really opened my eyes to how people treat other people, and what is viewed as a deciding factor in determining what makes that person acceptable to the viewer's clique. With out me even having a say in the issue, wearing a kilt has made me into something I am not, at least in other's eyes.

Wearing a kilt has made me a somebody, where before, I was a mostly unwanted nobody. And that just doesn't sit well with me.

The dreadlocks help a bit though. On some folk, you can actually see the panicked conflict in their faces, as their heads bob up and down, looking from kilt to dreadlocks, back and forth, busy trying to catagorize me into some mental filing cabinet folder that they don't seem to have created yet. It's actually quite amusing... Then again I was schooled in psychology and I have a sick sense of humour so others probably wont think it's funny. But I do.

Who would have thought so simple a garmet could cause such a complex reaction, and bring about such a cascading series of events that cause change?

[Blu (Ontario)]

I wouldn't call that a glowing report. A kilt is only going to be a positive experience if you want it to be. What were your expectations?

[Dreadbelly]

It was an honest observation. This forum is about all aspects of kilted life.

This is just a view point.

Aside from this observation, I have nothing but good things to say.

I have become painfully aware that kilts change your life.

I would have to say that change is 90% good.

[Blu (Ontario)]

...I would have to say that change is 90% good.

The tone of your post just seemed a bit downbeat. Glad to hear I was mistaken. Kilt-on my man! 8)

[GMan]

A sick sense of humour Maybe that is why I like you Glad it was a pretty good experience for you for the most part. I also notice that I get more respect while kilted.

[Andrew Breecher]

There's always been a change of perception based on the clothing people wear. A common experiment is to dress differently to go to the bank. Two people of the same race, gender, and age go to open a new account. One dresses in tatty clothing, doesn't shower for two days, or shave or wash their hands. The other is well-groomed and wears a suit and tie. When they talk to the bank representetive there's a drastic difference in how they're treated.

Now you're in a kilt, an outfit that's associated with weddings and functions and the military. I don't know what you're wearing with it, but if you have on hose and flashes and a sporran, you're going to look dressed-up, even if you've got on a tee shirt on top. Like it or not, you're now as dressed-up as if you were wearing a trendy black turtleneck and black chinos.

It won't be until enough men wear kilts in everyday life that it won't be seen as "dressing up." On the other hand, you could always get a UtiliKilt and change the oil in your car while wearing it. Haul around a few bags of manure to your garden. Go for a walk on a dirt road on a rainy day. Wipe your hands on it if you scrape your knuckles. Then go back to the museum - I bet you're treated like you were in days of old!

Andrew.

[Dreadbelly]

I have noticed lots of these little moments in my life along the way. At different times. I think I first started noticing it after I finished college, earned my Ph.D. and had Dr. put before my name. I have always been scruffy looking. Beard. Long hair. Jeans. Flannel. T-shirts. People always treated me like a scruffy person. When they found out I was a Ph.D. I believe that it made their brains implode. With the title comes a small degree of respect, but because of how I looked there was a good deal of, what's the word I am looking for, disdain. And conflict, visible conflict would happen when the two clashed together. I remember one time when I was invited as the guest speaker at a consumer watchdog group for the handicapped and mentally ill. In my mind, I was dressed up. I wore clean black denim jeans, and what I throught was a very nice black and white flannel with hints of purple and blue. I thought I looked just fine. I was told this was a casual event. I get there... And hoowee... Casual meant suits, blazers, ties, slacks, chinos, etc. A very snooty lady met me at the door and with out even asking who I was, seated me in the very back of the room in a dim corner, at a very lonesome table all by my self. When my name was called out as the guest speaker and I had to walk through the whole hall with everybody looking at me, and that poor woman realizing who I was and looking mortified, well, it was not a pleasant experience. That day I spoke on stigma and stereotypes, two problems that plague the handicapped and the mentally ill. And almost the whole time I did it, I leveled my stare on that poor woman. I never did get an apology. Nor did I ever go back to White Oak. It is fair to say most of these so called professionals are actually part of the problem and not helping things at all. And they want so badly to aid their cause.

People make all sorts of assumptions about me. And I encourage them to do so, by doing things like letting my hair dreadlock and wearing kilts. It's actually sort of facinating in a morbid sort of way to encounter people and see psychology at work. Am I baiting people? Or am I just giving them enough rope to hang themselves? Mayhap both. Since people seem to want to catagorize me, I feel I should give them a little extra to work with, and make them at least put forth some effort in their thought processes.

I am loving the kilt as a whole experience. My wife is quite taken with it as well. She is starting to enjoy observing people that are observing me.

Oh, and I had my first Marylin Monroe moment. Oh, to be free as nature intended. Lots of gasps though.

[Anthony]

It seems to me, most people place the greatest importance on that which is superficial, where you live, what you drive, where you work, how much money you make and list goes on.

From this social view "the Cloths make the man" and the car and the bank statement. And unfortunately people will deal with us differently based on how we're dressed.

There are a couple of places I've gone often wearing jeans and T-shirt and been snubbed by the waiters, gone back to the same place in my Tux after an evening out and had the same waiters bending over backwards. There are a number of reasons for this; they worry what other customers will think, if we can pay the bill and or they may be affraid of us.

Having lived a couple of years on the street I understand exactly how it feels to be unwelcome any place you go, to feel as if your invisible.

I too have seen how wearing a kilt changes the way SOME people look at me, mostly at work. Folks who've known me for ten years or more who no longer talk to me, and others I've seen around for at least as long who never spoke to me or looked at me directly who've become very friendly.

I commented to a friend the other day, it seemed folks had got use to the kilt. He said people ask him about my wearing a kilt all the time and they still talk about it, just not when I'm within ear shot. Thats okay by me, I'd rather they wonder whats up with me then the other way around. Very sad when one has so little in their own life they need to create drama concerning what someone is wearing, it's like getting free rent in their head.

I'm happy to hear you now have a kilt and that wearing it has been 90% Positive.

Any day on top of the dirt is a good day

[Andrew Breecher]

That's one thing I loved about hiking the Appalachian Trail. Out there, it doesn't matter who you were in "real life." You get college kids, lawyers, bankers, auto mechanics, carpenters, brilliant people, mentally handicapped people. Everyone's dressed the same, and smells just as bad after going for two weeks without a shower. A banker can't walk any faster or further because he makes more money than the short order cook. Everyone shows up at the shelter at the end of the day and takes off their smelly shoes and socks, and farts out loud, and grumbles about not having enough to eat. Everyone eyes everyone else's food like a hungry wolf, because it doesn't matter if you have more money; you can't carry more food because it's heavy. Backpacking is a great equaliser. One person might have started off with a plastic K-Mart poncho and another with a $400 Gore-Tex Patagonia jacket, but after a month the jacket's torn and stained, and you realise that Gore-Tex only works in the city, so you throw out the jacket and buy a K-Mart plastic poncho, or go without a raincoat at all because you'll get wet no matter what. It's society boiled down to its most essentials: you need to eat, sleep, and crap, and that's what people talk about. The most important things, no matter that you're dressed in sweat-stained rags that mice chew on because of the salt, that you haven't showered in a month, and your beard is longer than most women's hair.

There's probably a psychology/anthropology experiment in there somewhere.

Andrew.

[Pittsburgh Kilts]

Here's a question to consider: Besides the kilt, have you started being more concerned about the REST of your wardrobe? I know before I started wearing kilts, I owned nothing but white gym socks. What the hell did I need colored socks for? Now, when I put on the kilt, I try to wear a shirt that matches and socks that match. (Shoot, every shirt matches blue jeans). I polish my boots, for crying out loud!

If this is the same for you, them maybe part of what you are noticing is a response to your new fashion sense! Just something to think about.