This is more of a "this helps" department, but it sounds kind of wacky. Eat 2 pickled jalapenos, whole, seeds and all. (Just pop them in your mouth, chew and swallow.) Chase with a whole 12 oz can of Mountain Dew. It sounds silly, but there is a basis for it working. The capsaicin in the peppers helps release endorphin to make you feel a bit better, while the vitamin c and citric acid helps fight infection. Warning attached to this method: if you are not accustomed to hot foods, be prepared to cuss, holler, sweat, and sit in a chair being dizzy for a few minutes.