I have enough hair, but I've heard they use glue to hold mohawks in place. There's no way that's going in my hair! Plus, if I shaved the sides I'd be left with an undercut. Besides, I think my long hair looks rockerish enough already, without doing strange and abusive things to it. A bit grey, though!

And that's just the hair! I think the nose ring would drive me crazy, not to mention the pain of having the piercing, and, yes, my exposed hairy beergut would scare everyone off.

Not a good look for me, except for the kilt. It's interesting that the dialogue implies that the bald dad in the middle is already a kilt owner, if you read it carefully.