-You short out motion detectors
-Your coffee mug has a picture of your coffee mug on it
-You use your teeth to grind your beans


In the doctor’s office, a patient asks for advice,
"Doctor, what should I do?
Every time I come home from work, I see some strange man in bed with my wife. When I start yelling at her, she just locks me in the kitchen and tells me to calm down and drink a cup of coffee. This has been happening every day for the last four months."
The Doctor replies, "So how can I help you?"
"I just want to know - am I drinking too much coffee?"