I think there's something else going on here; I could be completely wrong, though.

I'm not sure that you feel the same connection to the tartan as Jock or some of the other Scots feel to their clan tartan. I don't think you were born and raised with that being "your tartan," and it isn't in your subconscious that you are part of that clan.

Is it reasonable to expect that of you? I'm not sure it is. You might feel differently about the cost if the tartan was a natural part of who you are and who your people are, though.

Like I said, I could be completely wrong in the way I'm reading your post, but this is something that I have been noticing for quite a while now...