(This is going to offend someone, I know it .)

While I may, at times, single out particular groups or kilted individuals for ridicule as the result of various decisions regarding "kit", I assure everyone that I am an equal opportunity kilted offender. If I have offended a group which does not include you, please inform me of my error in judgment and I will be certain to offend you in the future.

In case of offense, please fill out this form with a ball-point pen, and press hard, you are making three copies. Don't fill it out on your kilt, you'll poke right through and get ink on the fabric. White copy on top goes to the forum staff, yellow copy goes to me, you keep the pink copy on the bottom. In the case that you require more rapid delivery than allowed by the postal service or the vagaries of electronic communication, you may immediately file the white and yellow copies in the wastebasket. Keep the pink copy close at hand, as several reports distributed about your person may provide the feeling of thicker skin, and a large packet of them crammed down the sporran may, in some cases, provide a heightened feeling of real manliness.

If you yourself were not directly offended, but feel obliged to be offended on behalf of another, please fill out two complete forms, one for yourself, and one for the offended person (or group) by proxy. As these situations require immediate in-person delivery of the forms, be sure to file yourself in the wastebasket along with the white and yellow copies.

(This says "Army" all over it, but I think we can make adequate use of it.)



Sincerely,
Sean



Ok, now let's see how long this lasts!