Burns at the Farmyard.
Robert Burns and his brother Gilbert were leaning over a farm yard wall watching the hens and the cockerel scratching about.
One of the hens gives the cockerel the eye and he starts to strut across the yard to do his manly duty.
Just then the farmer comes out and scatters seed about the yard. The cockerel stops and starts to peck at the seed.
On seeing this Rabbie turns to his brother and says, "Gilbert I pray I will never be as hungry as that"

Women are beautiful and foolish.
Beautiful so that men will love them.
Foolish so that they will love man

Two little boys talking to each other.
I am four. Are you interested in women?
No.
Then you are three.

But your feet are dirtier than mine.
That is because I am a year older.