You asked about the tartan kilt vs. non-tartan kilt, and tartan kilt worn casually vs. tartan kilt worn with accessories. There isn't much difference in acceptance of the various kilts as men's attire in the midwest. I've traveled throughout the south, southwest, and northeast without incident. Strangers have never been a problem. People you know are more of an issue, whether friends, coworkers, or family. Solid color kilts are more likely to go unnoticed. Many people aren't observant enough. Tartans are harder to miss, add all the accessories, and people look and probably will ask questions to satisfy their curiosity.

One big key to successful kilt wearing is to be comfortable in what you wear. So wear what makes you feel the most comfortable, if it's a tartan kilt with flashes and sporran, then go for it.

As for what would make significant others most comfortable, ask.