LOTS of good lessons here!
i think the main thing i have read is that i ma the ADULT and i will come off with a lot more grace and class if i act like the adult. 'ods bodkins but that sounds so easy and is so hard. i also don't have nearly the intimidation factor as kilt wilter so the "wet yourself" option is pretty well out.
guess i will go for the interested and involved look for a while.
thanks all
macG