I can only add that in the UK, its appropriate to wear the medals of a deceased relitive at formal occasions, and you sometimes see widows/children wear in Glangarries/tams etc, On rememberance sunday I wear Gordon Tartan because of family connections to the Gordon Highlanders -Ive never served in the Gordon Highlanders (Im not old enough!!!) but many veterans have come and said how nice it is to see the Gordon Tartan still being worn, Ive never had a veteran challange me becasue I never served with the Gordons. (and im not called Gordon).

how about writing to the commanding officer? or charman of an association ?for a yay or nay?

In my mind honouring ones family, especially one who have served in the military is something that really should be encourged, especially by young people.