Pun Wars

**angel923** · 9th February 07, 04:11 PM

two men walk into a bar one should have looked

**AnimalK** · 9th February 07, 04:30 PM

Didja know Moses was a biker?

"'Yea verily, Moses struck down the Ammanites and all the land heard the roar of his Triumph !!!'..."

My favorite hymn is the one about Gladly, the cross-eyed bear. He sounds cute...

**SnakeEyes** · 9th February 07, 10:15 PM

These are supposed to make me laugh? No pun in ten did!

**Dreadbelly** · 9th February 07, 10:19 PM

Moses was the most wicked man in the Bible you know.

He broke all ten commandments at once.

**Warlock** · 10th February 07, 02:36 AM

crochet needles at ten paces. { you'll shoot your eye out kid...}

**AtagahiKC** · 10th February 07, 05:07 AM

Stop it. This isn't punny any more.

**Mr. Kilt** · 10th February 07, 10:27 AM

Some friars were behind on their belfry payments, so
they opened up a small florist shop to raise the funds.

Since everyone liked to buy flowers from the men of
God, the rival florist across town thought the competition
was unfair. He asked the good fathers to close down, but
they would not. He went back and begged the friars to close.
They ignored him. He asked his mother to go and ask the
friars to get out of business. They ignored her, too.

So, the rival florist hired Hugh MacTaggart, the roughest
and most vicious thug in town, to "persuade" them to close.
Hugh beat up the friars and trashed their store, saying he'd
be back if they didn't close shop. Terrified, the friars did so,
thereby proving that . . .

Hugh, and only Hugh, can prevent florist friars.

**Mr. Kilt** · 10th February 07, 10:27 AM

Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of his life, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail. And with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him:

A super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

**Mr. Kilt** · 10th February 07, 10:28 AM

Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says 'I've lost my electron.'
The other says 'Are you sure?'
The first replies 'Yes, I'm positive.'

**Mr. Kilt** · 10th February 07, 10:28 AM

A guy goes to a psychiatrist. 'Doc, I keep having these two dreams. First I'm a teepee; then I'm a wigwam; then I'm a teepee; then I'm a wigwam. It's driving me crazy. What's wrong with me?' The doctor replies: 'You gotta relax. You're two tents.'