My best one yet.

My wife is Korean. That means we frequent Korean Restaurants. Last time I went to a Korean Restaurant in a kilt, the hajima (loosely translates as lady of undefined age but somewhere between old enough to marry but not quite old enough for embalming) asked me in a casual way if I was scottish.

Now I'm a white trash hillbilly mutt from way back. My grandfather ran 'shine in the Louisiana/Arkansas area. Before that, they angered the government by running the underground railroad. We are pretty sure they've been in the country for a while, but we aren't sure exactly when they came from or how they came to be here. Literacy and all that.

The point of all that is I don't have a clue. But I've had everyone from Scots to Russians say I look like I'm from their country (russian woman once walked up to me in an airport and started babbling in russian without bothering to find out whether I speak it first).

So, it's in there somewhere. Dishwater brown hair, green eyes and a taste for strong drink, particularly a nice single malt.