Scene 26

Secret Headquarters of the KLF

Despite the events that had occurred during the night, I managed to go back to sleep. I woke up when I felt movement on my bed the next morning.

My eyes shot open as I felt the nude woman slide under the covers and press herself against my back.

“Good morning baby,” she whispered into my ear.

Oh no, it was Diane.

“Diane, listen,” I started as I tried to move away from her.

“Easy baby,” she said as she held me to her. “It’s me. I’m just here to welcome my husband home.”

“Diane, no,” I said as I managed to slip out of her grasp and slide to the edge of the bed. I turned to face her. “I’m sorry, but …”

“Shhh,” she said, placing a finger on my lips to silence me. “I know it’s been a long time, baby. I know that’s why you didn’t come to me last night, but it’s okay. It’s me and I love you.”

“But Diane, you don’t understand.”

“What David, that it’s been over a year? That will just make it more special.”

“No, there is something I have to tell you.”

“Whatever it is, I don’t care. I know we haven’t seen each other for a long time. I even know that you probably had other women in that time. I don’t care; you’re back with me now.”

As she moved for me, I pushed her away. “No Diane, I can’t, I’m not your husband.”

“Oh, don’t be silly,” she giggled, “Of course you are.” Her hands seemed to be everywhere on me.

I was getting a little desperate. “No, really, I am not the man you married. I never was. Didn’t Grant or David talk with you?”

Her hands continued to explore as I tried to keep her away. “Yes, they told me some silly story about how you’re not my David, how you came from some other world. But how could I possibly believe that?”

“But it’s true!”

“Oh, don’t be ridiculous. Why are you fighting so much? Of course you’re my David. You have the same eyes, your hair is the same, and I’ll bet everything else is the same.” Her hand trailed across my chest. “You even have the same scar that …”

Her eyes went wide and she pulled back. “What happened to your scar?” she asked.

“What scar?”

“Where that man knifed you, at that prison breakout?”

“I don’t have a scar, because that never happened to me,” I answered her seriously. “Because I’m not the man you married.”

Her eyes widened as the realization of what I was saying sunk in. She pulled back more and gathered the covers around her. “You mean it’s true, you really are from another world?”

“Yes, I’m not your David; I never was.”

She shrank into the covers. “Oh God, I’m so sorry.”

“Hey,” I told her, “Don’t be sorry. You thought I was your husband.”

“But you’re not! Oh, I am so embarrassed.”

I gently put my arms around her in a light hug. “Hey, don’t be embarrassed. Considering the situation, your actions were completely understandable. In fact, a part of me almost wishes I was your long lost husband.”

She looked up at me with a twinkle of hope and desire in her eyes. “Really? You know it has been over a year.”

“Whoa, cool off girl. I think you need a cold shower,” I laughed.

She also began to laugh.

I noticed she was squirming a bit as she tried to pull the covers around herself. “Uh, David?” she asked.

“Yes?”

“I’m feeling a bit under-dressed. Could you hand me my robe?”