Best dialogue resulting from my kilt

[ThinBlueLine]

Hey all,

I was at a party the other day, kilted of course, and a lady came up to me and said (in a tone close to condescending), "what is with the kilt?"
Before I could reply her less-than-sober husband said, "He is Ireland!" He then paused, realized that he was not quite right, and ammended, "Irish!"
The ever-charming wife turned to him and said, "It is Scottish, dumbass."

So, apparently, I am an island.

"I am a rock, I am an island." - Simon & Garfunkel
"No man is an island unto himself." - John Donne

[Nighthawk]

Gotta love those kinds of things, don't you? My wife and I were at dinner the other day, and this older lady came over to me and said "I was just looking out the window and it's getting a little windy out. You're wearing something under there, right?" She was being very polite and was obviously very concerned. My wife is actually a great gauge of people's manners. If someone is being condescending, she's like a bull dog. Otherwise, she's cool with it. My wife just started laughing! The kind lady looked very surprised and asked what was so funny. I told her that Jackie was just waiting for my smarta$$ answer, because I normally never give a straight answer, but in her case, I reassured her that I had anticipated the weather. Some people are just plain funny. You've got to LOVE those weird kilt inspired conversations.

[vinhen2]

This past weekend the Arkansas Scottish Cultural Society, mostly xmarksers and their spouses, marched in the Bradford Funfest Parade, in Bradford, Arkansas, pop. 800, in White County. (According to Wikipedia, some (!) of Bradford's suburbs include Russell and Possum Grape.)

After the parade, several of the kilted walked back up the street, some looking for food, others to our cars. While walking up the sidewalk, we walked past several people, mostly families that had lined the streets of Bradford to watch the parade.

As we walked past a little girl, perhaps 5 or 6 years old, and her mother, I overheard the little girl ask, "Mommy what is under there?"

The girl's mother, in that deep, slow, emphatic voice that only mothers use, said, "Honey, you don't want to know!"

[McFarkus]

Sounds like the wife was treating you the same way she treats her husband.

[ggibby]

I just want a "Like" button...

[dsinohio@hotmail.com]

Hi, all! I live in a very "Celtic" area (lots of Irish pubs and bars, Highland festivals, etc.), but every time I venture out in a kilt, I'm assaulted by the same, hackneyed questions and comments. Even though I'm fairly new to the army of kilt-wearers, I've come up with some retorts (don't know how original they would be to you guys, but apparently aren't old to the people who receive them!).
I recently wandered down to a local Hooley to celebrate a neighborhood beautification, and was accosted by a LARGE biker-type and his lady coming out of a local bar. He took one look, and immediately asked (apparently thinking he was impressing his buddies), "Hey! What are you wearing under there?". I just looked at him, pondered for a second, and told him "I'm just curious if your lady is wondering why you'd ask!"
I am often asked why I am wearing a kilt, and now my usual answer is "Mainly to keep my wife off my back...she gets embarrassed and upset with me when I go out of the house without it..."
And I get various reactions when some dope who is "original" enough to ask "I like your SKIRT!", and I gracefully reply "Thank you very much! And I admire your blouse...do you have a special bra to go with it?"

[Bugbear]

Gotta love those kinds of things, don't you? My wife and I were at dinner the other day, and this older lady came over to me and said "I was just looking out the window and it's getting a little windy out. You're wearing something under there, right?" She was being very polite and was obviously very concerned. My wife is actually a great gauge of people's manners. If someone is being condescending, she's like a bull dog. Otherwise, she's cool with it. My wife just started laughing! The kind lady looked very surprised and asked what was so funny. I told her that Jackie was just waiting for my smarta$$ answer, because I normally never give a straight answer, but in her case, I reassured her that I had anticipated the weather. Some people are just plain funny. You've got to LOVE those weird kilt inspired conversations.

You've got a cool family, Hawk. I like when you talk about them.

[Tartan Tess]

My boyfriend and I Contra dance every week-end and he always wears a kilt.
One night he had something else to do, but showed up for the dance later wearing pants.
You always start the dance squared off with another couple and the other woman said " Eric, I have never seen you with your pants on"....

[Nighthawk]

You've got a cool family, Hawk. I like when you talk about them.

Thanks! I'm rather fond of them, too.