Mad as hell!

[McMurdo]

Well this is a tough situation, but I'm sure that with some polite conversation you can let her know your reasons for wearing the kilt. It sounds like you have always been able to talk with her so this really should be no different, let her know why you are wearing the kilt and let her know how her reaction to it is affecting you.

As for the upcoming party if you going kilted just try to be sure to be as smartly put together as you can be, I have found even the most skeptical will treat me better if I am well turned out. You might want to forgo the kilt for her party, but that is of course your call to make.

[Rampant Lion]

What I would do, is just simply have a pleasant chat; perhaps over coffee somewhere. Go wearing pants, but just ask her straight out what it is that bothers her about your kilt wearing. You two are good long-time friends so I think that she'd plainly tell you why. Tell her that you won't be offended by her answer, that you just want to understand. Once you find out why she is not comfortable with your kilt-wearing you can address it.

Thunderbolt mentioned that it is normal to men to wear kilts. I have to disagree. If kilt-wearing was normal you'd see more of them. In actuality, with your wearing a kilt, you're actually being odd/different/weird/strange. It has been over two years since I saw someone wearing a kilt that wasn't at a highland games or kilt night.

So I think the best idea is just to get it out in the open. Ask her why she doesn't like your kilt-wearing and once you have her response, just reply appropriately.

[RockyR]

I agree with rampant lion... Talk to her 1 on 1 about it. Tell her that you heard how she dwells on it and her comments make you uncomfortable as her friend. Ask her to respect your choice and please stop obsessing about it. Explain that you can take some good natured ribbing (and kind of expect it) but that she's crossed the line into full blown insulting.

[Captain Karrot]

Send her to this website...it puts it well...

http://s93583130.onlinehome.us/kiltedlife/support.html

[DireStraitsFan]

Thank you for all the well-thought comments.

Just to clarify for scottography: I have never worn it in her presence. She has never seen me in it. That makes her incredulity that much more dumbfounding.

Also to clarify: I am not gay. I have never worn women's clothing. I have no desire to. I am not looking for attention. I came to the kilt from a love of history, my ancestry, and all things British. I know you guys don't need to hear this, but to outsiders what we wear can come across as really strange. Some people are born without imaginations. And it can be so infuriating that people get so upset when you won't just follow the herd. I get p*ssed just thinking about it!

[beloitpiper]

I have never worn it in her presence. She has never seen me in it. That makes her incredulity that much more dumbfounding.

Maybe that's why she's confused. Maybe because she actually thinks it's a skirt, but once she sees that it is a kilt she'll understand. It's up to you whether you wear it to her party, but I think talking to her, telling her that's it's a kilt and that you wear because of your heritage she'll understand.

[Abax]

I'd echo much of the advice you've already received, but couched in different words. Reactions like hers are often based in fear. Ask her what bad thing she is afraid will happen as the result of you wearing a kilt. You'll probably be able to assuage her fears. Also consider that what you've heard from others may not be exactly accurate, so ask her directly about what she's saying and thinking. Finally, even nice people can act rudely with a little too much alcohol. Could this have influenced her behavior at a dinner or party?

I don't agree with the sentiment that you're not ready to wear a kilt. I'd hope the responses you receive here help you in that endeavor, not discourage you.

Abax

[DireStraitsFan]

I'd echo much of the advice you've already received, but couched in different words. Reactions like hers are often based in fear. Ask her what bad thing she is afraid will happen as the result of you wearing a kilt. You'll probably be able to assuage her fears. Also consider that what you've heard from others may not be exactly accurate, so ask her directly about what she's saying and thinking. Finally, even nice people can act rudely with a little too much alcohol. Could this have influenced her behavior at a dinner or party?

I don't agree with the sentiment that you're not ready to wear a kilt. I'd hope the responses you receive here help you in that endeavor, not discourage you.

Abax

Thanks very much. I appreciate it.

***

By the way, just to clear something up, I had no intention of wearing the kilt to her party. I was just mentioning that I was going to see her soon, and the topic of the kilt is still a sore subject with me. So, I am afraid of how I might react to any comments she will make. That was the only reason I mentioned the party.

Thanks everyone.

[James MacMillan]

So, the question is: how would you handle this situation?

I have not read anyone else's post, so I don't know where the others are leaning, not that it would change my opinion.

Several things that you need to know about wearing the kilt.

#1 It will initially draw attention to you. If you can't handle this attention (be it good or bad) don't wear the kilt.

#2 It is an extremely comfortable way of dressing.

#3 Many people have pre-conceived ideas about the kilt.

You need to examine just why you want to wear the kilt, and what price you are willing to pay for doing so.

You will get both positive and negative reactions from wearing the kilt. Those who are your true friends will accept your choice, those who are not true friends will not.

Some people are insecure, and need to ridicule others in an attempt to bolster their own self-esteem.

Be true to yourself, and worry less what others think. Examine your own motives and make a choice. Do you really want to wear the kilt? I think you may not yet be ready.

[DireStraitsFan]

Do you really want to wear the kilt? I think you may not yet be ready.

I've been lurking here for over a year. I own 4 kilts of varying types. I am ready to wear it. Thanks.

Do I intend to wear it everyday? No. Silly question and judgement by the way. But thanks for the comment all the same.