Something that's been bothering me lately...

[Panache]

Nighthawk,

There are always going to be strong opinions on XMTS like any other forum.

It says much that our membership take ownership in this forum and are very much active in expressing their concerns and suggestions to maintain and improve it.

Mike (Splash_4) came back with a great saying from his time in India

Offense is taken, not given

While I fully admit that this isn't always the case, if one operates on this assumption and remember that poise is the art of raising the eyebrow and not the roof these little slights (real or perceived) are best ignored and allowed to slip by the way side without further thought (as such things should be)

As a gentleman I deal in careful courtesy and hard knocks.

I am proud to say that seldom on this great forum have I had to resort to the later.

The key to creating a polite society is to exemplify the manners in which you believe people should be treated.

Just my thoughts

Cheers

Jamie :ootd:

[Nighthawk]

Nighthawk,

There are always going to be strong opinions on XMTS like any other forum.

It says much that our membership take ownership in this forum and are very much active in expressing their concerns and suggestions to maintain and improve it.

Mike (Splash_4) came back with a great saying from his time in India

Offense is taken, not given

While I fully admit that this isn't always the case, if one operates on this assumption and remember that poise is the art of raising the eyebrow and not the roof these little slights (real or perceived) are best ignored and allowed to slip by the way side without further thought (as such things should be)

As a gentleman I deal in careful courtesy and hard knocks.

I am proud to say that seldom on this great forum have I had to resort to the later.

The key to creating a polite society is to exemplify the manners in which you believe people should be treated.

Just my thoughts

Cheers

Jamie :ootd:

You're quite correct, as always. It was, in fact, an attack on one of your opinions (that I happened to agree with) that inspired this thread in the first place.

[JimB]

How do I miss all the good stuff?
:-)

[Panache]

You're quite correct, as always. It was, in fact, an attack on one of your opinions (that I happened to agree with) that inspired this thread in the first place.

Nighthawk,

Well if I didn't bother to notice it I don't see why anyone else should!

For some time I have been a Moderator of XMTS and very outspoken in how much I value this forum so my opinions have been attacked for quite some time.

When I respond I try my best to rise above the antagonism and get to the real issues.

I fully believe that honesty and politeness are the best way to go through life. If others can't, then perhaps my behavior will be the mirror that reflects their conduct to them (hopefully they just might learn something).

How do I miss all the good stuff?
:-)

Jim,

You are a gentleman and it's amazing what unpleasantness a gentleman seems to always avoid by his impeccable timing and ability to disregard poor behavior!


Cheers to both you gents!

ith: :blimp: :ootd:

Jamie

[Nighthawk]

Nighthawk,

Well if I didn't bother to notice it I don't see why anyone else should!

For some time I have been a Moderator of XMTS and very outspoken in how much I value this forum so my opinions have been attacked for quite some time.

Cheers to both you gents!

ith: :blimp: :ootd:

Jamie

I can see your point. Things were said that were just extremely judgemental, and were direct attacks on what I personally believe. You said a lot of the things that I think, and were not just disagreed with- you were out right attacked! As a mod, I'm sure you don't see it. I usually let those kinds of things go myself. But this was a case that I found to be not offensive, but so closed minded that it bothers me.

And here's the real heart of the matter- If you disagree with my way of thinking, then fine. You're entitled. I don't begrudge anyone that. The problem is people who not only disagree with you, but try to force you to agree with them, or they get very condesending and tell you that you don't agree because you're uneducated or uninformed. If I were to tell you that there was Civil War action in the Rocky Mountains, you might not know about that and may argue it with me. I can then get on google and look up the battle of Glorieta Pass and give you facts and information. On the other hand, if I were to express a preference towards being called Celtic as opposed to Scots or Irish, there are people who would not wish to- and then tell me that I shouldn't either. And the argument is "Because I said so." It's the "You're wrong because I said so" thing that is starting to get on my nerves.

This is one of the comments that really bothered me:

"... the self-justification of those people who feel that it is their right to alter Highland traditions to suit their comic opera perceptions of a pseudo-Celtic world that exists only in the world of delayed adolescent role-playing, Larping, and fantasy video games."

I'm not Scottish. My grandmother was. We are not in Scotland. I am in Colorado. It is in fact our right to not alter, but to allow to evolve, the traditions of our ancestors. "Comic opera perceptions?" If it's so offensive, then don't go to the North American games! But why directly attack and disparage us for making the traditions something unique to us? This is the exact closed off, "my way is the only right way" kind of thinking that got me bothered.

[ShaunMaxwell]

To prove your point by arguing with you... Isn't Glorieta Pass in New Mexico? And on the southern tip of the Sangre de Cristo Mountains?

[macwilkin]

To prove your point by arguing with you... Isn't Glorieta Pass in New Mexico? And on the southern tip of the Sangre de Cristo Mountains?

Indeed it is -- but Colorado troops were responsible for the defeat of Sibley's Texans there. Huzzah for the Pike's Peakers! *

http://www.colorado.gov/dpa/doit/arc.../civilwar.html

*No offence meant to my Texan friends -- my wife was born in Dallas.

T.

[Tony Miles]

. The problem is people who not only disagree with you, but try to force you to agree with them, or they get very condescending and tell you that you don't agree because you're uneducated or uninformed.

Exactly - again well said. Even worse they have no idea what you know or don't know nor do they in a reasonable manner try to have a bi-directional conversation. Quite a bit of self-aggrandizing pontifications from those who by reason of years alone should be sharing wisdom in a peaceful manner instead of bitter animosity

[Highland Logan]

Exactly - again well said. Even worse they have no idea what you know or don't know nor do they in a reasonable manner try to have a bi-directional conversation. Quite a bit of self-aggrandizing pontifications from those who by reason of years alone should be sharing wisdom in a peaceful manner instead of bitter animosity

Those with the years, experience and education to have the wisdom to form opinions on may of the topics raised on this board in regard to Scottish attire are quite often brushed off with those famous phrases; I like it like this, do what you want, this isn't Scotland... ect, ect. How do you want the members with wisdom to act to this type of treatment? Regardless of what people have been taught in school or told by their folk for the past 40-30 years, opinions are based on years of experience and education; i.e.. wisdom. Not some fanciful idea that everyone has some valid right to be heard on every topic equally. I think, I feel, therefore it is, not an opinion. I could give on opinion on the future of space travel. I have no background in this topic, nor have been schooled in any science related to this topic. If I were to join a message board created around this topic and populated by people who have knowledge in this field, could I just start telling them they are wrong, and my opinion counts? Not likely! So why do so many here feel they can do the same to people who have been wearing Scottish attire for more years than they have been on this earth? If you feel so strongly that your opinion has merit, than be prepared to defend it. And when your opinion gets brushed aside, maybe it was because it was flawed... or have all your opinions been right?

Frank

[Big Mikey]

When reading some posts, I remind myself that what I am seeing is merely the written word. I have not had the opportunity to see the individual whom has posted. Though we may use "smilies" to try to convey a particular trait, we can't see the tongue planted firmly in cheek nor the subtley raised eyebrow or the mischievous gleem in an eye. There are words that may stir up our emotions, raise our hackles or give us cause to pause and reflect but without benefit of face to face communication, we are not completely informed. Without that, we can't truly understand what an individual is trying to say. We don't always have to agree with what a fellow member is saying but we should readily accept his/her opinion.