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[ForresterModern]

First, ask for a formally WRITTEN decision on the reasons why you are not being allowed to wear the kilt to the prom be delivered to you on School or Board of Education stationary, if necessary ask one or both of your parents to meet with the principal to acquire that document. If he provides it, compare it to any written documentation of school dress code present and available to the public, with specific attention to what is said about school sponsored events. Unless it specifically precludes the wearing of a "skirt" by a male student you should be good enough to have a case to take to the school board for their review, and again ask for a formal response. If they come up with another line of excuses as to why you should not be allowed to wear your kilt to the prom, try to attack each of their points individually, especially as they relate to the dress code and to personal civil liberties. Then go to the local press and ask them if they would like to print a human interest story.You might even make a phone call to your local ACLU (American Civil Liberties Union) whose job it is to seek out and support instances where an individuals civil rights may be being violated, and discuss your case with them. They often will assign an attorney to a case for review purposes to see if their is legal basis for pushing a civil rights violation case into the courts. Often times just this sniffing around and question asking by the ACLU will get folks thinking twice about drawing a line in the sand about dress codes and personal freedoms, etc...

Obviously this is going "balls-to-the-wall" with your desires, and only you can weigh how important this is to you versus how much trouble it may cause for you, your school, and your principal, and what long term effects that trouble may have in relation to your education at this school----afterall, you still have to show up for school and go to classes and graduate for some significant time after prom (even if it is only a few weeks). So you would rather not have anybody important lose face over the whole issue.

And by the way, if you do decide to just wear a tux with as much tartan accessories as can wear, please let us know on this forum before you go out and buy stuff becasue I know I for one will be hapy to fund your needs in such a situation, as I am sure others on the forum would also support.

Good luck.

jeff

[Strider]

Obviously this is going "balls-to-the-wall" with your desires, and only you can weigh how important this is to you versus how much trouble it may cause for you, your school, and your principal, and what long term effects that trouble may have in relation to your education at this school----afterall, you still have to show up for school and go to classes and graduate for some significant time after prom (even if it is only a few weeks). So you would rather not have anybody important lose face over the whole issue.

ForresterModern I would have to agree with you. For most people they rely on what people think when they hear their name. Which goes with losing face.

I just thought of something so please pardon a second post. If your principal is someone who is scared of losing face and possibly getting fired. The threat of the media could be big enough for him to change his mind. BUT as always be respectful. This will get you farther.

[RockyR]

What about asking students to sign a petition saying that they'd like to see you in a kilt at prom? Take that to the school board along with your letter to the principle and a transcript of his 'reasoning'.

[ForresterModern]

Nighthawk

Although we have similar overall opinions of this situation I would suggest a bit of a change in language, or at least specification of the difference between ignorance and uneducated. To not know something is to be uneducated about it. To then be educated about it but not care (show indifference) is then being ignorant of its value and relevance. I believe that this principle is no longer uneducated about the kilt and its heritage and propriety for wearing to prom. He is uneducated about the civil liberties of Isaac and is ignorant of his rights as a human to dress as he sees fit and appropriate for this occasion. Lack of education is usually remediable with a little effort, while ignorance of the facts to which one was just educated is a active personality choice.

Ignorance is active indifference, it is a strong word, and quite offensive to many, especially when it is thrown in their direction. Uneducated or indifferent are softer ways to describe degrees of the same thing, with uneducated on one end (relatively innocent end), indifferent in the middle, and ignorant at the other (more malignant) end of the spectrum. Caution in using them is always best to keep from turning off your listener when attempting to educate or persuade someone.

j

[Lallans]

I loath and despise PC, but in this sort of case one must use the tools that come to hand. The principal has left his flank exposed by using the term "loincloth"- a racially charged, and quite possibly outright racist, expression if ever there was one. Start with that to get media attention.

[denmcdough]

Definitely a slippery slope, here. What you need to do, specifically, is ask to see the school dress code. Is there anything specifically about a kilt in it? Or, is the code being interpreted by the principal's bias?

If there is no mention about the kilt and you were not aware, they DO NOT have a case! I see no reason why you should not be permitted to wear your kilt. Some words a school administrator does not want to hear: "you'll be hearing from my lawyer in the morning!"

In reality, if you want to persue this, you have a legal right to get a lawyer and take this to the next step. Or, talk to the school board. Better yet, see if many students will support your decision to wear a kilt.

[denmcdough]

Sorry, I do not agree with MoR's assessment! As a person who works with many school districts (sometimes with legal matters), I know how the game is played. No reason for you to suck it up and give in. If you feel like going further, you have the right, as an American citizen, to do so! PERIOD!!!!

[auld argonian]

Sorry, I do not agree with MoR's assessment! As a person who works with many school districts (sometimes with legal matters), I know how the game is played. No reason for you to suck it up and give in. If you feel like going further, you have the right, as an American citizen, to do so! PERIOD!!!!

So you are aware of the fact that school districts have their own lawyers either on staff or on retainer and that they will be most happy to counter any threats of legal action that someone may make? Here in Chicago they have a whole legal department and they need it. Do you think that these school districts just fell off the turnip truck and have never dealt with situations like this before?

Ever heard the phrase, "more trouble than it's worth"? Seems to me that when a lot of cases where these "right to wear the kilt" cases are settled it's not because the "administration" decided that the complainer was right but rather because the "administration" decided that it was more trouble than it was worth to have to listen to the injured party complain and threaten to take it to the highest court in the land. So when you win, have you scored a victory or have you just been appeased so you'll shut up and get back to school/work? I mean look at the possibility that they figure that it's bad enough to have a "weirdo" in a kilt around but it's a whole lot worse to have a NOISY weirdo in a kilt around. But...hey! A win is a win, right? Remember the old saw, "you have not converted a man merely because you have silenced him"...and that works both ways in these situations, don't it?

So what I've been trying to point out here is that it is seldom gonna be a zero sum game and it is better to try to come to some kind or reasonable accord before the threatening starts because then it's not a matter of one party being a "bully"; at that point you're both bullies and the real principle gets set aside while you fight it out to see who's the bigger bully.

Whatever IssacM decides...whether he wants to show up kilted anyway and take it to the Supreme Court if need be or if he wants to just chalk this one up to bitter experience...it's his decision cause he's the guy on the ground right now and the only one who has the perspective to make it. Some actions can have serious ramifications that you can't possibly foresee at the time so I have to take exception to that "better to apologize than ask for permission" line of logic...many times all the apologizing in the world can't fix things.

Gee...if I were a strict Freudian, I'd say that I was playing the part of the super-ego right now...but I'm a Jungian, dammit!

Best

AA

[Zardoz]

This issue just re-affirms my usual approach to this sort of thing;
"It's easier to ask forgiveness than it is to get permission"

[Lallans]

Per MoR, who has a pretty good point, I might better have qualified what I said with "IF you go to the media," etc- and to which I would also add, "If you go to the media, go to Fox News if you have a local station." And talk to your parents first, that should be a given.