Wedding Attire

[Highland Logan]

I think I would have to agree with both PiobBear and MacMillan of Rathdown. It is within reach for most people to have a suit in there closet for those occations when they need them. My family was not rich by any strech of the imagination, but when the time called for it my Father ensured we were dressed correctly. People can always say "I don't know what to wear", which is easly solved by a quick search of the web on proper dress etiquette. The other is price. I know that saving up for exspensive clothes can take time, but every man should have a suit, and like PiobBear states, the thrift store can be your friend if an event comes up before you have purchesed your "good suit". I also know that in todays climit it can be hard for people to "guess" what they should wear to an event. If you dress correctly for the event, you can never be "over-dressed", there however can be those who are under-dressed. To show up like a slob at an event you were invited to is an insult to the host, and all those in attendance, there can be no if's, and's or but's about it. I have yet to see an invatation sent out that left no time to do a 5 min search on the web to figure out what to wear, or the day it would take to rent or buy a basic suit. At my Fathers funneral last August, my uncle who was visiting from out of town managed to drive 100km away and find a suit so that he was dressed correctly for the service. People who chose not to research or purchase the proper ware do just that, "CHOSE"! Here is a good link to help those getting started in black tie. It is also a good primer to get you ready for suits.

Frank

[kiltedsawyer]

I think this thread has gotten far off course from the original question and should be closed.

[campbell]

You stated that you do not have a lot of money. Like you, I am very poor. I am handicapped with neurological problems. I always laugh at threads with Aryll jackets and the like, because I am one of the few people who cannot spend $200-$500 on a kilt jacket. This is the outfit I wear to formal events.

1. I wore a SWK, www.stillwaterkilts.com in blackwatch tartan to my brothers wedding last year.
2. A black, 3-tassel sporran on a silver chain.
3. Black kilt belt with silver buckle.
4. White long sleeve shirt from wal-mart.
5. Solid green tie from www.solidcolorneckties.com.
6. Off-white hose with green flashes.
7. Black one-button Eton jacket from http://www.uniformalwearhouse.com/ap...ojackets4.html

For a funeral wear a black tie and black flashes. If you are getting married wear a silver (or platinum) tie if you are a Scot, and a gold tie if you are Irish. The flashes should be red, green, or blue.

[Prester John]

Just don't outdress the wedding party!

[Alan H]

Yeti, there sure is a lot of ranting about what is and is not "proper" in this thread.

On our own forum, not so long ago, there is a picture thread written by the father of the bride. The groom had orange hair (I think) several tattoos and wore a black utilikilt, a black rock & roll band t-shirt, and black assault boots. At a wedding like that, if Yeti wanted to wear a Great Kilt, what's the problem?

I've been to a Ren Faire-type wedding where the bride a groom and most of the guestswore "Faire-garb". If it's a wedding like that, then what's the problem with a Great Kilt?

I've been to a "pagan handfasting"...and while I have no comment on the religious implications of such the guests wore everything from Ren Faire garb to contemporary semi-casual clothes. The Great Kilt would have been just fine at this ceremony, and in fact the argyll with waistcoat would have stood out.

So while some of us have more traditional tastes, we should remember that not EVERYBODY has the same taste. "Every man should own a suit". ??? I don't own a suit. I own two-three sportcoats/slacks combinations and now a tweed kilt jacket (another one in the works) but I do not own a "suit". I have no need to wear one, here in California.

Yeti, I would tell the bride and groom what you had planned and show them a picture of something similar and then ask their opinion. IF you get an outright "no", or if you pick up negative "vibes", then opt for something more conservative, as best you can for the dollars in your bank account. Teaming up your Stillwaterkilt with a white shirt and tie, nice kilt hose, a nice belt and dress shoes can hardly offend anyone, even at a more traditional affair. Nonetheless, it all depends on the nature of the people getting married and the ceremony they have planned.

I would recommend ignoring "THE RULES" as espoused by whomever, and instead of that, focus not on "WHAT IS PROPER" but instead, focus on what a real gentleman would do... namely treating the people with whom you are interacting with kindness and respect. That means asking your friends some questions, listening to the answers, and dressing appropriately for *THEIR* day.

As an addendum, it's my own personal opinion that it never hurts to know what "THE RULES" are, or at least have a clue what they are. However, at least here in California, not a whole lot of people abide by those "rules" and while nobody I know will look down on anyone else for "overdressing", the general guide for attire is pretty relaxed.

One last thing....In my opinion the gentleman is not someone who dresses better than someone else. The gentleman is not someone who dresses appropriately for the occasion. In my opinion, the gentleman is someone who treats others with respect and integrity and understanding.

[berserkbishop]

Yeti, there sure is a lot of ranting about what is and is not "proper" in this thread.

On our own forum, not so long ago, there is a picture thread written by the father of the bride. The groom had orange hair (I think) several tattoos and wore a black utilikilt, a black rock & roll band t-shirt, and black assault boots. At a wedding like that, if Yeti wanted to wear a Great Kilt, what's the problem?

I've been to a Ren Faire-type wedding where the bride a groom and most of the guestswore "Faire-garb". If it's a wedding like that, then what's the problem with a Great Kilt?

I've been to a "pagan handfasting"...and while I have no comment on the religious implications of such the guests wore everything from Ren Faire garb to contemporary semi-casual clothes. The Great Kilt would have been just fine at this ceremony, and in fact the argyll with waistcoat would have stood out.

So while some of us have more traditional tastes, we should remember that not EVERYBODY has the same taste. "Every man should own a suit". ??? I don't own a suit. I own two-three sportcoats/slacks combinations and now a tweed kilt jacket (another one in the works) but I do not own a "suit". I have no need to wear one, here in California.

Yeti, I would tell the bride and groom what you had planned and show them a picture of something similar and then ask their opinion. IF you get an outright "no", or if you pick up negative "vibes", then opt for something more conservative, as best you can for the dollars in your bank account. Teaming up your Stillwaterkilt with a white shirt and tie, nice kilt hose, a nice belt and dress shoes can hardly offend anyone, even at a more traditional affair. Nonetheless, it all depends on the nature of the people getting married and the ceremony they have planned.

I would recommend ignoring "THE RULES" as espoused by whomever, and instead of that, focus not on "WHAT IS PROPER" but instead, focus on what a real gentleman would do... namely treating the people with whom you are interacting with kindness and respect. That means asking your friends some questions, listening to the answers, and dressing appropriately for *THEIR* day.

Well said Alan. You expressed my thoughts and frustrations in a clear, concise, unoffensive manner that saved me the trouble.


BB

[macwilkin]

So while some of us have more traditional tastes, we should remember that not EVERYBODY has the same taste. "Every man should own a suit". ??? I don't own a suit. I own two-three sportcoats/slacks combinations and now a tweed kilt jacket (another one in the works) but I do not own a "suit". I have no need to wear one, here in California.

Of course, Alan, that statement works both ways.

T.

[Bugbear]

Oops, cajunscot, and Alan, I didn't mean to post between your replies. Apologies.

Kind of funny, though, I was talking about trying to conform to both prospectives as best as one is able...

[Alan H]

Of course, Alan, that statement works both ways.

T.

Absolutely, Todd!

I just wrote a long reply and deleted it before posting. This is one of those times when I think it's best if I just go look at another thread.

Look at it this way, Todd. If I were to be invited to visit you in your home, knowing a bit about who you are, I would in fact NOT wear a kilt, but rather would dress cleanly and smartly with a button-down shirt, hard-soled shoes and a reasonable pair of slacks. This is because I know that you save your kilt for particular occasions, and for you the kilt is a special thing, not "everyday".

Were you to visit me,I would assume that, being a gentleman, you would consider my preferences in my home, the nature of what people wear here in northern California, your own integrity and preferences, and come up with something appropriate in about twenty seconds worth of thought.

The thing is, ninety-nine times out of a hundred, being a gentleman is not ALL that hard!

[Panache]

Whether Alan goes to visit Todd or Todd goes to visit Alan I think the most appropriate accessory would be a nice bottle of single malt to celebrate the occasion!

Cheers

Jamie