Traditional Highland Wedding Attire?

[CMcG]

The photos and ideas are all much appreciated. Apart from everyone wanting to look their best, there appear to be a few common themes that I'd like to pick up on.

The first is dress codes for time of day. Before 6:00, we know it should strictly speaking be tweeds for daywear, or else formal morning dress (i.e., black barathea silver button Argyll or bbsba). In the evening, it could again be the versatile tweeds (as a suit equivalent) or else formal evening wear (i.e., black or white tie).

But there also seems to be a notion that the groom gets a special license to "take it up a notch," and so we have some people wearing what looks like formal evening wear before 6:00. I wonder if that pertains to the catalogue OC Richard posted that calls for "full dress" for the groom, and suggests "it is readily adaptable for evening wear afterward"? As in, the groom wears their absolute best, and it doesn't matter what time of day it is?

The second theme has to do with the rest of the wedding party. Some brides/families/in-laws want more of a say in people's attire... whether or not they get their way is another story. I imagine some negotiation might be required if there were to be any conflicting opinions. Any experience with that?

And it seems quite traditional that people are suggesting the groomsmen can pick their own attire, particularly that they can wear their own clan tartan. That also makes sense if people own their own clothing and won't be renting. There is something to be said, however, for some unity in the wedding party, without necessarily having to match. Did anyone come up with a strategy to tie their group together, without imposing a "uniform"?

[Father Bill]

For the wedding party, a "level of dress" is appropriate and avoids the uniform thing (which makes me roll my eyes).

My wonderful daughter-in-law sent each of her bridesmaids a cloth sample and asked them to select a dress that matched the colour. I was amazed at both the individuality and the matching of the ladies in question. My son also simply told his best man and groomsmen, "Black tie, gentlemen" and again the result was "matched individuality" which was a wonderful thing to behold. It has respectful dignity for both the wedding party, and for the individuals who comprise it.

[OC Richard]

My wonderful daughter-in-law sent each of her bridesmaids a cloth sample and asked them to select a dress that matched the colour. I was amazed at both the individuality and the matching of the ladies in question.

Yes I've seen that! What a great solution to the eternal Bridesmaids' problem: the dress that gets picked always looks best on the girl who picked the dresses, usually not so much on the rest of the Bridesmaids.

I used to pipe at 40 or so weddings a year, and it was a little game of mine to try to figure out which girl picked out the dresses. Nearly always the dress looked clearly better on just one of the Bridesmaids.

So it was cool to see, at one wedding, what you describe. Somebody had picked out a lovely sage green linen fabric, and each Bridesmaid was free to make it into anything they wanted. It was ideal because of the great age range of the Bridesmaids, from a High School age girl (who had a short slit strapless thing showing plenty of skin) to a professional woman in her 40s (who had an elegant business suit).

About the not wearing black during the day, as I've mentioned before I've piped at a number of weddings where one side of the family had flown over from Scotland to attend, all of them invariably dressed in black Prince Charlies for the daytime wedding! I've been, at such things, the only kilted person not in black.

[Jock Scot]

Congratulations Colin! If you really mean what you are asking then you have to be mindful of three things. Firstly, ignore what most hire companies are providing. Secondly, avoid what most of the world------including some of those in Scotland------ thinks is THCD kilt wedding attire. Thirdly, take little notice of what is worn by the groom in most wedding pictures on the internet. If you can do those three things, then you are well on the way to do the job properly.

For a suit equivalent. A sober tweed kilt jacket, white shirt, plain hose, day sporran, black brogues--well polished, suitable non tartan tie and most importantly, your own tartan kilt. None of this, "the kilt must match the colour of the Brides eyes" ,or whatever, nonsense.

It you want to go formal(morning suit) and I might add, an uncommon event in the Highlands, then a black barathea, silver buttoned, argyll(BBSBA) fits the bill perfectly. A dress (formal) sporran is best (but not essential), white shirt, suitable tie(NOT BOW TIE), light weight well polished black shoes and if you must, perhaps diced or argyll hose. Some grooms do wear a plaid, but not often and again the groom wears his tartan.

As to headwear, none, unless the elements are being particularly unkind and dreadful.

For the guests then they follow the grooms lead in general attire but taking care not to outshine the happy couple and their immediate family.

Its that simple.

[CMcG]

Congratulations Colin! If you really mean what you are asking then you have to be mindful of three things. Firstly, ignore what most hire companies are providing. Secondly, avoid what most of the world------including some of those in Scotland------ thinks is THCD kilt wedding attire. Thirdly, take little notice of what is worn by the groom in most wedding pictures on the internet. If you can do those three things, then you are well on the way to do the job properly.

...

It's that simple.

Yes, I think you know exactly what I meant when I asked

But I was also asking for specific examples. What did you wear for your wedding? Would you do it the same now?

[Jock Scot]

I did know exactly what you meant Colin, but others reading this who may not know and may need a wee bit of assistance in forming their ideas for future reference.

First time around I wore a morning suit as I married in England. At the next attempt, I married in Scotland. It was a small informal affair as it was second time around for us both. I did wear the kilt, I am away from home at the moment so no picture, but I wore my Clan tartan kilt, white shirt, a subdued drop down tie, black barathea, black buttoned(inter-changeable buttons, silver/black) kilt jacket and waistcoat, I think Bottle green hose and black brogues and my usual black sporran.

Would I do anything different? Yes. I would advise my son not to leave his tweed jacket where his dog could not rip it to pieces! Then I could have worn my tweed jacket, instead of lending mine to him!

[Father Bill]

Aye. I have a clerical lounge suit (plain black) with two jackets and three pair of trousers. It originally had only two pair of trousers, but the dog got one jacket, so I had to buy another suit so that I'd have backup and of course, got another darned pair of trousers in the process.

[Jock Scot]

Congratulations Colin! If you really mean what you are asking then you have to be mindful of three things. Firstly, ignore what most hire companies are providing. Secondly, avoid what most of the world------including some of those in Scotland------ thinks is THCD kilt wedding attire. Thirdly, take little notice of what is worn by the groom in most wedding pictures on the internet. If you can do those three things, then you are well on the way to do the job properly.

For a suit equivalent. A sober tweed kilt jacket, white shirt, plain hose, day sporran, black brogues--well polished, suitable non tartan tie and most importantly, your own tartan kilt. None of this, "the kilt must match the colour of the Brides eyes" ,or whatever, nonsense.

It you want to go formal(morning suit) and I might add, an uncommon event in the Highlands, then a black barathea, silver buttoned, argyll(BBSBA) fits the bill perfectly. A dress (formal) sporran is best (but not essential), white shirt, suitable tie(NOT BOW TIE), light weight well polished black shoes and if you must, perhaps diced or argyll hose. Some grooms do wear a plaid, but not often and again the groom wears his tartan.

------------

Someone sent me an email this morning asking me if I was "being serious" with what I wrote in the first paragraph above and " surely I must be joking"? Well yes, I am being serious and I am not joking.

If we then read above, what I advised Colin for traditional kilt attire as "suit equivalent" and " the formal morning suit equivalent" -------which in passing, is not only worn in the morning, but for afternoon wedding services as well and is perfectly acceptable to be worn on into the evening festivities too------------ there are few pictures of such attire that I describe on the internet, in the wedding context and few pictures of such in the kilt hire brochures and just as few, I am afraid, on this website

Just because the "trade" are hiring out their wares as "traditional Kilt attire" does not, sadly, in anyway make a correct description from a traditional kilt wearers point of view.

[tpa]

For a suit equivalent. A sober tweed kilt jacket, white shirt, plain hose, day sporran, black brogues--well polished, suitable non tartan tie and most importantly, your own tartan kilt.

I'd agree with Jock on this one, but sadly the choice is not always with the wearer. I'd have chosen my brown lightly furred day sporran for my daughters wedding, but was overruled by the 2 most important females at the event, my daughter and my wife. However as the wedding was not in Scotland, I expect I got away with it.

I was lucky with the brogues, the sole fell off the ones I was wearing less than an hour before the wedding, (they were a pair of 37 year old seconds), but was fortunate in being able to rush home and dust off another black pair with minutes to go.

[Jock Scot]

Ah yes! I remember the last minute wedding attire panic well! Does it happen to everyone? Smashing picture TPA.