I got the go-ahead for a kilt at my own wedding.

**sbevans** · 28th December 15, 07:19 PM

Originally Posted by Liam

Is a wedding not a commencement of a partnership? Many modern weddings do not have the bride's family pay the entire freight so the Groom should have a legitimate say in how he and his groomsmen are dressed. It is not always about what the bride or her mother wants!

I couldn't agree with you more. As with any good partnership, it is important for both partners to have input. As the OP stated, he likes the idea of people wearing their clan tartans, but what does his wife to be like? And if the others standing up already have highland attire, are they able and willing to incur the expense of the rental? Planning a wedding requires compromise, but don't loose sight of the most important part, which is the many happy years you will have together!

**Jock Scot** · 29th December 15, 01:29 AM

The Bride asking and possibly demanding that the groom in particular and others in general wear a tartan other than their own just shows a complete and utter lack of understanding of Scottish traditions and does not bode well for the future of their marriage.In my book, a short two word answer would put the the situation in perspective from a Highland Scot's point of view--------- and the second word would be "off"! I am sorry but this blatant and contrived playing at being a Scot really won't do.

**terry m** · 29th December 15, 01:43 AM

Your wedding is one of the most special days of your life and 38 years ago our priest gave us this advice, "It is a most special and wonderful day and family traditions from both sides may crop up. But remember this, it is above all YOUR WEDDING." So I respectfully put in my ten bobs (50 pence for anyone under 50) worth.
The only correct way is your way, please don't get hung up on trying to do "the right thing" and nothing of yours. After all, you wouldn't decorate your home to please everyone else.
It is YOUR day, and may it be a wonderful day that you both look back on with love and joy, not " did we do it correctly" So, if YOU wish people to wear their own tartan, that's the way it is, if YOU wish people to wear one tartan throughout, that's the way it is. If they are offended they are not worthy of being YOUR guest. I would be honoured and privileged to be a guest at a wedding so why impose my views on someone else's special day.
Incidentally if I was out in my kilt and anyone accused me of playing at being Scottish, well, they'd better be wearing armour too...lol.
My old Mrs and me were guests at a wedding in Moffat in Scotland three years ago and the bride and groom requested that no one wore a kilt. The only man in a kilt was the piper.
I wish you both a long and happy marriage, it is a much knocked and maligned way of life nowadays and I raise my glass to you
Just my thoughts.

**MacGumerait** · 29th December 15, 04:02 AM

Originally Posted by Jock Scot

The Bride asking and possibly demanding that the groom in particular and others in general wear a tartan other than their own just shows a complete and utter lack of understanding of Scottish traditions and does not bode well for the future of their marriage.In my book, a short two word answer would put the the situation in perspective from a Highland Scot's point of view--------- and the second word would be "off"! I am sorry but this blatant and contrived playing at being a Scot really won't do.

Jock , I fully understand your comments and agree . However , I don't think the " OP " was actually going down that path .

The "OP's " original post was suggesting that his Bride was agreeable to a kilted wedding . It would seem the " OP " himself is trying decide whether it is appropriate for the wedding party to do the following :

A. The groom and the groomsmen to wear their own tartan ( if they have one )

B. The groom wears his tartan and allows the groomsmen to wear a universal tartan

C. Or perhaps everyone in the same tartan for the sake of uniformity

I think perhaps the OP was asking for guidance and is not sure which is appropriate .

All three options have been used and do work ( depending on the individual ) , although I do prefer option " A " whenever possible .

Cheers , Mike

**Jock Scot** · 29th December 15, 04:21 AM

I did understand that Mike. All I was doing was pointing out that one option was not likely to be met with enthusiasm, to put it mildly, from Highland Scots in particular and Scots in general who wear their own Clan/family tartan. For those who do not own a tartan kilt, then hiring is of course an option, but in my experience most Scots just wear a suit.

**OC Richard** · 29th December 15, 04:45 AM

Originally Posted by Jock Scot

All I was doing was pointing out that one option was not likely to be met with enthusiasm, to put it mildly, from Highland Scots in particular and Scots in general who wear their own Clan/family tartan. For those who do not own a tartan kilt, then hiring is of course an option, but in my experience most Scots just wear a suit.

Yet, the Kilt Hire industry is enormous in Scotland, a size that indicates that a vast number of weddings a year in Scotland have the men in hired tartans. IIRC there was an intersection in Glasgow that had Kilt Hire shops at three of the four corners. (Sort of like seeing the Celtic FC shops across the street from each other.)

On my first trip to Scotland, in 1986, I was struck by the number of Kilt Hire shops (there are far more today, I think). What I also found interesting was that in every home we went into in Scotland (we were staying at people's homes rather than hotels) there was at least one framed wedding photo on the wall, these all showing the men-folk in matching (obviously hired) kilts. It was one of the peculiarities we noted, along with the Hall Tree with a selection of walking sticks we seemed to see in every home.

I came away with the impression (inaccurate as it may be) that in Scotland nobody owns a kilt but everybody gets married in one.

BTW from my experience seeing a framed wedding photo on the wall is unusual here in the USA. Here we have all the wedding photos in a special album which gathers dust on a shelf somewhere.

**MacGumerait** · 29th December 15, 04:49 AM

Originally Posted by Jock Scot

I did understand that Mike. All I was doing was pointing out that one option was not likely to be met with enthusiasm, to put it mildly, from Highland Scots in particular and Scots in general who wear their own Clan/family tartan. For those who do not own a tartan kilt, then hiring is of course an option, but in my experience most Scots just wear a suit.

Very very true Jock !!! The same holds with my own family !