what else could I say??

**Coinneach** · 28th August 07, 04:04 PM

Especially with strangers I've taken to answering "the question" with, "You first" and then waiting. No one has ever taken me up on it. I can only assume it's ok for them to ask me, not for me to ask them.

**rollerboy_1979** · 28th August 07, 04:27 PM

I think we all hear inappropriate things on a daily basis, so "The Question" shouldn't faze us. Has anyone ever bought a car and been asked "How much did you pay for it?, or "What's she like in bed?". Here's one that jumps off the charts; it was asked of me within six months of my wife's death, "Are you dating yet?". That one cut me to the quick so I lost my cool, but generally, I can deflect an innapropriate comment with a witty remark. "The Question" comes with the territory, so you can either have fun with it, or gently remind the person that it's simply not appropriate to ask. I like, "A lady doesn't ask, and a gentleman doesn't answer".

**Archangel** · 28th August 07, 06:09 PM

Originally Posted by rollerboy_1979

I think we all hear inappropriate things on a daily basis, so "The Question" shouldn't faze us. Has anyone ever bought a car and been asked "How much did you pay for it?, or "What's she like in bed?". Here's one that jumps off the charts; it was asked of me within six months of my wife's death, "Are you dating yet?". That one cut me to the quick so I lost my cool, but generally, I can deflect an innapropriate comment with a witty remark. "The Question" comes with the territory, so you can either have fun with it, or gently remind the person that it's simply not appropriate to ask. I like, "A lady doesn't ask, and a gentleman doesn't answer".

Yep, used that one too.

The dating one, yes, that was tacky. For people I care about I mark the calender at six months after a death. There's a point about that time where people feel it most and a friendly call seems to go over well.
Sorry about your loss.

**rollerboy_1979** · 29th August 07, 07:10 AM

Thank you Archangel. A friend doesn't need to say anything........just offering a sympathetic ear is enough during a time like this. Getting involved in the kilted life is one way I'm coping with my loss. It's a pleasant diversion that I know my wife would have loved. She was with me when we happened upon the Braemar Gathering in Scotland, so we both fell in love with the culture and the kilt. I know she's smiling down on me. I can't begin to tell you how many inappropriate things I've heard, primarily because it's an awkward situation no matter how you slice it. Just like the old lady who asked "The Question", sure, she didn't have to ask, but once she did she was committed. I'm not so sure calling her "stupid" was the right approach, but who are we to judge? I think I would have pulled her aside and said something like, "Madam, I am the store detective working undercover.........there's a hidden camera under there" or something silly like that. As I said in my other thread "Rude Comments", I'm not worried about things like that, they could actually turn out to be fun interactions.

**Rampant Lion** · 29th August 07, 07:42 AM

Originally Posted by Archangel

I guess I have a bit of a disagreement here. From your first paragraph, I start from the premise that asking anyone about their underwear, or lack of, is not a valid question.

I remember as a child my mother showing me the mail order catalogue (way back, way, way back), and turning to the size chart page where there were drawings of people in their basic underwear. She said that nobody but a doctor was allowed to touch, look or ask about the area that covered. In all my years I have come across no reason to disagree with that teaching (well, until my late teens anyway).

In a way I have to agree with you; your mother's advice is obviously what children should be taught. However, I think there's a big difference between asking a child about "the area" and asking a grown man about what's covering the area. Also, like I said before; I don't think most people are asking what you personally are wearing under the kilt, but instead are asking what is typically worn under the kilt. Anyway, that's just how I see it.

**LordKiltClad** · 29th August 07, 08:18 AM

Originally Posted by Panache

"Goodness gracious I would never had thought that Scotsmen wear pink silk thong underwear with sequinned embroidered hearts and black lace! I'll never think about Sean Connery in the same way again!"

Cheers

Jamie

Jamie,
Only under a Pink Kilt. Now where would I find such a kilt....hmmmm
Also, does the Flame Haired Goddess know?

And to think this would really have changed the mood of the fight scene from Braveheart when all the Scotsmen in the front did a lift and taunt to the English. They would have gotten cat calls.

Back on topic, I stick with the "it's none of your business" and leave it at that.

**jmercier** · 29th August 07, 08:50 AM

I've been asked "The Question" many times before myself, rather than let it bother me that people want to know what i'm wearing under my kilt, i just give the same answer every time.

"My shoes and socks of course"

**Alan H** · 29th August 07, 10:47 AM

Originally Posted by James MacMillan

To women, I like - "Let's go over there and compare."

YES!...YES! My new favorite!

**Alan H** · 29th August 07, 10:50 AM

I will admit, once at a Beer and Kilts night that a young woman came up to TimC and myself and asked the question....

.........................and we showed her.

she was mortified. Served her right...**laughing**..But that's not someting I'd do every day.