Kilted attire for attending a Wedding

**pastorsteve** · 27th February 09, 12:43 PM

As an usher you should actually be in a tux. You are a member of the wedding party, and if they are in tuxes you should be too. If they are not in tuxes the people paying for the wedding (usually the bride's family) will/should indicate what attire is appropriate for the wedding party.

On an aside - not indicting just curious - how is it that she's never seen her favorite uncle in person - the one who wears a kilt - kilted? Again just curious.

**rollerboy_1979** · 27th February 09, 11:59 PM

Originally Posted by pastorsteve

As an usher you should actually be in a tux. You are a member of the wedding party, and if they are in tuxes you should be too. If they are not in tuxes the people paying for the wedding (usually the bride's family) will/should indicate what attire is appropriate for the wedding party.

On an aside - not indicting just curious - how is it that she's never seen her favorite uncle in person - the one who wears a kilt - kilted? Again just curious.

In Chicago, ushers are usually not a part of the wedding party, so they're not normally dressed in a tux like the groomsmen. I live over 2,000 miles away in California, and my niece has seen me in my kilt when she visited, but my sister has not. As I said, I'll go along with my sister's wishes.

**pastorsteve** · 28th February 09, 12:05 AM

Maybe it's just a phrasing issue but the groomsmen ARE the ushers. That's how weddings are generally done world-wide. It's not an exception for Chicago. Thus as an usher or Groomsman- you are the wedding party.

From Wikipedia (not always perfect but correct here) A groomsman or usher is one of the male attendants to the bridegroom in a wedding ceremony. The term groomsman is more common in the United States, and usher is more common in the UK. Usually the bridegroom selects his closest friends and/or relatives to serve as a groomsmen, and it is considered an honor to be selected. From his groomsmen, the groom usually chooses one to serve as best man. The duties of the groomsmen are to help guests find their places before the ceremony and to participate in the wedding ceremony.

**rollerboy_1979** · 4th March 09, 12:04 AM

Originally Posted by pastorsteve

Maybe it's just a phrasing issue but the groomsmen ARE the ushers. That's how weddings are generally done world-wide. It's not an exception for Chicago. Thus as an usher or Groomsman- you are the wedding party.

From Wikipedia (not always perfect but correct here) A groomsman or usher is one of the male attendants to the bridegroom in a wedding ceremony. The term groomsman is more common in the United States, and usher is more common in the UK. Usually the bridegroom selects his closest friends and/or relatives to serve as a groomsmen, and it is considered an honor to be selected. From his groomsmen, the groom usually chooses one to serve as best man. The duties of the groomsmen are to help guests find their places before the ceremony and to participate in the wedding ceremony.

In Chicago, at Catholic wedding masses, we never called the groomsmen "ushers", but I think we're splitting hairs here. To clarify, I have not been asked to "stand up" with the groom in a tux, I'm simply being asked to escort famiy members to their pews in church, along with one other person.

**davedove** · 4th March 09, 06:00 AM

Originally Posted by rollerboy_1979

In Chicago, at Catholic wedding masses, we never called the groomsmen "ushers", but I think we're splitting hairs here. To clarify, I have not been asked to "stand up" with the groom in a tux, I'm simply being asked to escort famiy members to their pews in church, along with one other person.

I have seen a lot of times where it is two different positions. The groomsmen hang out with the groom, you know to either make sure he goes through with it or to help him make a hasty escape.

The ushers are another set of men or boys, often cousins or nephews, who escort people to their seats.

**svc40bt** · 4th March 09, 08:55 AM

In the weddings I have been to and in, including my own, the groom and groomsmen are already standing in front before everyone is seated. Therefore ushers are required to seat people and escort the mothers of the bride and groom.

**Panache** · 4th March 09, 09:07 AM

In every wedding that I have been part of or attended the groomsmen acted as ushers before taking their places with the groom.

Cheers

Jamie

**MacMillan of Rathdown** · 28th February 09, 11:23 AM

Originally Posted by pastorsteve

As an usher you should actually be in a tux. You are a member of the wedding party, and if they are in tuxes you should be too. If they are not in tuxes the people paying for the wedding (usually the bride's family) will/should indicate what attire is appropriate for the wedding party.

Actually, it is the responsibility of the groom to see that his attendants are properly dressed, and to pay for any special attire that may be required. The groom is also supposed to be responsible for the cost of the church and the officiant celebrating the marriage, as well as paying for the license most cities/states require. He is not required to bear the cost of floral arrangements, or musical entertainment. These items, like the reception that follows, are down to the bride's family.