Black Tie means a bow tie not a black coloured tie

[bikeolounger]

I've never understood the connotation that "rural" people somehow resent all manner of "proper" attire. I've heard this a lot here in SW Missouri, but if you look at photos from the late 19th century/early 20th century, people simply knew the levels of attire for certain functions. Robert Burns was a puir ploughman frae Ayr, but he also could socialise with the gentry, and benefited from it through patronage.

My grandfather and great-grandfather, for example, were Iowa farmers, but both owned suits (not just one), French-cuff shirts and other kit. Sure, they wore overalls in the fields, but when it was time to go to church or lodge, they wore their best, as they respected those institutions.

Yes, the kilt may have been "work" clothes at one time, but the kilt also could be "formal" attire as well -- the pedigree isn't really a good excuse for rejecting formal attire.

I'm afraid this post is just as judgemental of those of us who take pride in our formal attire as the people who judge those who do not wear it.

Regards,

Todd

And you misread my intent. The apparent judgemental voice was to make a point--that too many who wear formal attire who look down their noses at those of us who cannot justify the expenses involved in wearing the stuff. In general, I simply find that because I don't "fit in" for such formal occasions, I just don't go.

[macwilkin]

And you misread my intent. The apparent judgemental voice was to make a point--that too many who wear formal attire who look down their noses at those of us who cannot justify the expenses involved in wearing the stuff. In general, I simply find that because I don't "fit in" for such formal occasions, I just don't go.

But aren't you being just as judgemental and making assumptions that everyone who wears formal attire thinks you don't "fit in"?

If you don't like formal attire, or can't justify purchasing it is one thing. I won't "look down my nose" at you over that -- but I do take exception at being judged as a snob just because I do wear formal attire.

T.

[Panache]

And you misread my intent. The apparent judgemental voice was to make a point--that too many who wear formal attire who look down their noses at those of us who cannot justify the expenses involved in wearing the stuff. In general, I simply find that because I don't "fit in" for such formal occasions, I just don't go.

I think the point of the original post was that if one wishes to attend a formal event then it behooves that person to dress appropriately.

If they don't know how to the onus is on them to do their homework and find out.

I have a full formal kilted rig,

I have cause to wear it a couple of times per year.

I don't look down at someone who doesn't own a formal outfit.

However if I am at a black tie affair and see someone not appropriately dressed I wonder

Do they not know what "black tie" means?

Do they feel that they aren't bound by social conventions?

Did they not care enough to wear an appropriate outfit?

If you go to a formal event once every decade and hire an outfit to do so that is perfectly fine.

If you choose not to attend a formal event because you don't have or don't want to dress formally that is perfectly fine.

If you go to an event that specifies a type of dress and don't wear that type of attire that is not very respectful to the hosts.

Just my two cents

Cheers

Jamie

[Panache]

Just to be clear

I should also note that some events are "Black tie" optional.

If so it would be poor manners for those in formal attire to in anyway shape or form to look down on or think less of those in semi formal attire.

Cheers

Jamie

[Spc. Scott]

Just to be clear

I should also note that some events are "Black tie" optional.

If so it would be poor manners for those in formal attire to in anyway shape or form to look down on or think less of those in semi formal attire.

Cheers

Jamie

Jamie nails it here. In my opinion it is far worse for someone to look down on another than it is to be wearing your best and still be under-dressed.

[davedove]

Everyone must be careful, because "snobbery" can go both ways. It is just as bad for someone to look down on those who are "unrefined" as it is for the other side to look down on those who are "dandies".

Some people can't be bothered to get dressed up and attend formal events, or just don't have the occasion to do so. I say that's fine, but I also think they're missing out on an experience.

I was raised in rural southern Illinois. My relatives were for the most part farm folk. My dad over the years raised horses, cattle, and even pigs, yet he owned a suit for nicer events. Granted, I don't think he ever wore a tuxedo, but he would have if the occasion warranted.

I have the occasion to get dressed up formally once or twice a year, usually on cruises, but sometimes other events. I wouldn't want to dress that way all the time, and generally don't even care to wear a tie, but I enjoy doing it at those times because it's something special.

Dressing appropriately is not about being superior, it's about respecting the host of the event.

[macwilkin]

Everyone must be careful, because "snobbery" can go both ways. It is just as bad for someone to look down on those who are "unrefined" as it is for the other side to look down on those who are "dandies".

Some people can't be bothered to get dressed up and attend formal events, or just don't have the occasion to do so. I say that's fine, but I also think they're missing out on an experience.

I was raised in rural southern Illinois. My relatives were for the most part farm folk. My dad over the years raised horses, cattle, and even pigs, yet he owned a suit for nicer events. Granted, I don't think he ever wore a tuxedo, but he would have if the occasion warranted.

I have the occasion to get dressed up formally once or twice a year, usually on cruises, but sometimes other events. I wouldn't want to dress that way all the time, and generally don't even care to wear a tie, but I enjoy doing it at those times because it's something special.

Dressing appropriately is not about being superior, it's about respecting the host of the event.

And thank you, Dave, for understanding my point.

Todd

[macwilkin]

And you, also, neglected to see that I was going for "over the top" to make my point. Note to self--folks around here don't understand my literary devices.

My apologies if I didn't understand your literary devices. My point was that your "literary device" in saying "too many" people who wear black tie & attend formal events were judgemental of you is not fair to everyone who does, nor is it absolutely correct.

Regards,

Todd

[Smayniac]

Some people can't be bothered to get dressed up and attend formal events, or just don't have the occasion to do so. I say that's fine, but I also think they're missing out on an experience.

I was raised in rural southern Illinois. My relatives were for the most part farm folk. My dad over the years raised horses, cattle, and even pigs, yet he owned a suit for nicer events. Granted, I don't think he ever wore a tuxedo, but he would have if the occasion warranted.

Dressing appropriately is not about being superior, it's about respecting the host of the event.

I'm with Dave here, while I own bits and pieces of formal kit, I have few occasions to use them. I find though, that I am often the sole tie wearer at a family holiday gathering, sometimes joined by young Scooby, who still enjoys the novelty of "dressing up."



I enjoy wearing a tie, and given the odd appropriate occasion, would enjoy wearing "real" black tie too.

Bob

[David Dubh]

So I'm not sure why this is being flogged so much. Black tie means black bow tie. White tie means white bow tie, if your scottish white lace jabot can be used (see Sir Sean Connery being gonged). When you receive an invitation dress appropriately!! If it says black tie then that is what is expected, formal wear is usually suite or higher. If the invite is to a picnic of horse riding then you aren't going to wear black tie. But please dress in clean non holed clothing, don't wear your pj's and slippers (this is a disturbing trend)