I got the go-ahead for a kilt at my own wedding.

[HuDonald]

Terry,
I'd say where what YOU (and by extension, your bride, and both your families) want to wear. Don't worry so much about what people on the internet think. This is a specialized forum, with people representing a more selective population, including those who may hold stronger opinions. We all appreciate their inputs, and their insights, and for the enjoyment of the knowledge and history of kilts, they are most welcomed! But they likely won't be at your wedding, and they certainly don't speak for all/most Scots. Most Scots I've encountered either in the US, England, or Scotland, have enjoyed seeing me in a kilt, and of all different tartans I own. I have never received a negative comment regarding my wearing of the kilt. Not one.

Full disclosure: I'm Chinese. I don't even look white - much less a Scot. My wife carries the Scottish heritage from her father's side - and she is very much her father's daughter.

I wore a kilt (and got my FIL to wear one, for the first time) at our wedding. I wore it happily, and all my groomsmen wore tuxes, and had matching bow-ties and cummerbunds custom made from the same run of tartan as my kilt, in my wife's family tartan. Every received compliments, everyone was happy. My wife's family, especially. We had a Chinese ceremony in the morning, in which we both wore traditional Chinese garments. In the afternoon, we had our official and western ceremony, where she wore a white wedding gown and I was in my Kilt+PC. It was a coming-together of cultures and backgrounds, and we were all proud to embrace them.

I would venture to say that yes, as Jock Scot said, SOME people may have heavy opinions, but a lot of people out there either wouldn't know enough to care, just don't care, or see it like how everyone else sees any kind of clothing - they like to see it worn well. Nobody wants to see their heritage butchered by some hooligan wearing it backwards or torn to shreds. But when you wear it, wear it properly, and wear it with pride. When I attend church services at my in-laws, there are many Scots in the congregation, and I've always been praised and appreciated in upholding the tradition and the garments. And as far as I know, there is far more tartan in the congregation now on Scottish holidays, than there ever have been.

Your motives sounds as true as mine, which is to respectfully celebrate heritage and culture. There will always be nay-sayers. no matter what or where. As long as you're respectful and carry yourself as such.

Regarding the piper, we had initially planned for the piper to play throughout the earlier part when all the guests are being seated, as well as when the bride was walked down the isle. We had also planned on having a beautiful outdoor garden wedding. But as rain pushed everyone into our rain-site, the piper played when the bride was escorted down the isle by her father, and when we walked out together at the end of the ceremony. He played Highland Cathedral, Black Bear, Scotland the Brave, and one other song.

BTW, my wife just walked in and agreed with me. Wear what you want. Don't worry about the kilt/tartan/dress-code police. Just be happy!

I feel a bit put out here and feel with all due respect I must make my feelings known, I am not contriving to play at being a Scot. I am, and always will be English. However I have a great love, admiration and respect for the Scottish people, their traditions, history and the beautiful country of Scotland. For that reason I decided to wear a kilt occasionally and also for love and pride of my wife who's maternal family are Scottish.
My kilt is not a play suit it is a proud statement of heritage.

[OKSooner]

Is a wedding not a commencement of a partnership? Many modern weddings do not have the bride's family pay the entire freight so the Groom should have a legitimate say in how he and his groomsmen are dressed. It is not always about what the bride or her mother wants!

When brides are in full control of groomsmen apparel, you start seeing them far too match-y with the bridesmaids.

[Stokegers]

Hi

I wore a Maxwell muted kilt whilst the rest of the wedding partt wore highland grey.

The only thing I would have changed is that I would have brought my then 4 year son a Maxwell muted kilt as well.